Sunday, February 21, 2010

Our True Relationship

After a conversation with a dear friend, my mind was drawn out in contemplation about the course of my life and Heavenly Father’s plan for me. I have realized that He has been mindful and watchful of my entire life. He has heard my every cry and because of His love for me, there have been certain trials I have had to sustain JUST long enough for my heart and soul to be modified. I know the absolute necessity of trials. I understand the profound impact on the soul and I recognize that my Heavenly Father is in pain as I am in pain. In reality, our loving Father is hurting for all of us when we are hurting, and yet does not take these trials and challenges from us because he loves us and sees the big picture—He knows that it will be for our best good!

A number of years ago Justin and I had a firsthand look into this reality. Eli was not yet two years old and was in need of surgery (had the surgery not occurred, he would have been negatively impacted for his entire life) and as hard as it was for him to understand, we were not able to give him a Sippy cup of anything in preparation for the surgery. We cried as he cried, but knew that relieving that pain would be the source of diminished blessings down the road. We refrained! Next, we handed our baby into the arms of a doctor at Primary Children’s. He had never been in the arms of strangers without us and what’s more he was going to be in pain that he would not understand. I desperately wanted to take the pain from him, but knew that I could not. He woke up from the surgery needing reassurance from Justin and I, and his big brown eyes filled with tears when we walked into the room. We just held him tightly, and cried ourselves knowing the pain he would have to endure, but we knew that it was for his good.

I am grateful for the hard parts of parenting and the small inkling of a window it gives into God’s love for us. I can feel His love in the middle of this trial and know that I am not in pain for the sake of pain. There is a bigger picture! There is a bigger picture for all of us and we will receive that witness after the trial of our faith (Ether 12:6). He sent His only begotten son into the arms of “strangers”. Christ is the mediator with the Father and I know that Christ pleas our case before God. I can sincerely say that I am grateful for trial because, in His wisdom, my life has been modified on many fronts. It indeed has been made richer and fuller because of the trials and challenges I have endured in the past and I have faith that this current trial will also be turned for my good (D&C 98:1-3).

It has been a blessing to have the gospel in my life and the knowledge of the “true relationship in which we stand toward God (namely, God is our Father, and we are his children)”, because our prayers really do become natural and instinctive when we understand this relationship (Bible Dictionary, prayer). It is comforting to know that He is there for all of us in this same way. He is no “respecter of persons” (Acts 10:34) and will place divine tutorials in our paths, because He loves us and so we can become like Him (John 15:1-2). That is great news!

Love to you,



  1. Becky, I really like this post about the bigger picture and our true relationship. Your perspective in life and attitude during this trial gives me much strength and inspires me greatly. I know it is the same for everyone who reads it as well. :) Thank you for choosing to be happy and being such a great example to all of those around you. I love you so much.
    Love, Kristin Welker

  2. Having missed church yesterday due to travel it was nice to come home and read your blog. The Holy Spirit resonates when you share your experiences. You are an instrument in HIS hands and will continue to be blessed for your goodness. Love seeing the pics of your cute family. Love you AUDREY

  3. Becky, I have been praying for you and your family. It's amazing how much your trials can help inspire so many others. Stay Strong! Ann Lowe

  4. Becky - you are amazing and I am embarrassed I haven't called or emailed... I've been thinking and praying for you and your family! I wish I could give words or encouragement and comfort like you did when we lost Owen - I still refer to your letter when I'm having a hard time. I guess the best thing I can tell you is that I love you!