The Long and Climbing Hill

We are getting ready for the second round of Chemotherapy tomorrow and with the preparation comes more insights and blessings. It has been confirmed over and over in the last three weeks that among my greatest blessings in life are my relationships. I feel so blessed to reconnect with past friends and connections, and overwhelmed with the new friendships that have come into my life as a result of this diagnosis. The Lord works in mysterious ways!

Speaking of mysterious, I was rushing around yesterday morning trying to get ready to meet my mother-in-law and niece, Emily at the Temple. I jumped into the car, clothes and recommend in hand and was feeling excited to be removed from some of the chaos in my life and just feel peace. Well, I was driving up Sunset Drive (which is an incline of sizeable proportion!) and gaining some momentum and SPEED to catch the light to turn onto Highway 89, when to my horror, at the peak of my acceleration and a menial glance to the right, I realized that I was being clocked by a police officer. DANG IT, the lights flipped on! My nausea returned (not due to the Chemotherapy regime :)!) and I awaited the impending doom.

The officer slid up the side of my car and asked why I had been pulled over, which by the way, I have never understood—if he did not know, he wouldn’t have pulled me over, and if I say that I don’t know, am I slapped with an additional “DUH” ticket? It really is an exercise in futility, unless it serves to challenge me not to answer sarcastically and end up in jail!

Anyway, I ended up giving him my license and sitting there in a deplorable state, when all of a sudden a completely inappropriate thought came rushing to my mind, “Dang, if my hair was already gone…!” I almost made myself laugh, but in the pitifulness of the situation, I just decided to sit there and humbly take the punishment (though, for the record, I do not remember speeding prior to the Chemotherapy :)…it probably is an unlikely side-effect…). To my surprise, when he trotted by up to the car, he looked at me and said, “Ms. Anderson, I am not going to issue you a citation today, but you’ve got to watch your speed!” I choked back emotions and the “Cancer Card” excuse and thanked him.

As I continued my journey to the Temple, a metaphor popped into my mind. The metaphor of, “The Long and Climbing Hill”! I think that all too often we find ourselves feverishly rushing around to “DO” in our lives and we go from one point to another missing critical experiences, in lieu of expectations and the push towards the elusive reward in the future (Highway 89!). We are all on the path of the LONG AND CLIMBING HILL, some of us are steadily climbing and watchful, others are broken down along the road in need of some help, some are even going the wrong way entirely, while still other’s of us have been ARRESTED (or so we think!) in our journey and stopped by the ‘police officer’ of life (who would have most likely been Satan in this metaphor had he given me the ticket…but for now he is just trial!).

It has been a real blessing to be “PULLED OVER” in life for a while, to feel the wind on my face with more gratitude, or notice the chirping of tiny birds in the yard, or the anticipation of the changing season, and to feel the long and sustaining hugs of friends and family, new and old. I feel grateful for the tiny and distinct blessings that are on my LONG AND CLIMBING HILL. They were there all along but it took this trial for me to pause and listen. I am excited to see what God has in store! What ‘mysterious ways’ will be created because of this challenge and what I will encounter on the journey. I pray I will see His tiny miracles.

I know deep down inside that all of these things will give me experience, and will be for my good (D&C 122:7), if I do not shrink at this trial or falter in my faith and resolve. I continue to be so grateful for all of your love and support. Thank you for sharing in this challenge! I know that the push to the top of the hill of life is much easier and pleasant with the love and blessing of a great family and friends. I’ll sign off with a quote from C.S. Lewis:

“We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be.”

Whatever our station on the LONG AND CLIMBING HILL, I hope we can all put our trust and faith in Him who created us all and loves us without end (Isaiah 41:13).

Love to you,

Becky